Sunday, August 29, 2010

My baby's coming out this Friday.
Honestly I am feeling pretty scared, nervous, worried, happy, insecure, paranoid and whatsoever.

I think too much sometimes I'm stressing myself out. It's crazy you know. The nearer the date, the more I feel like giving up. I KNOW SIOW RIGHT?! Like wtf am I thinking man? The future scares the shit out of me ar seriously. I keep thinking about all the fights we're gonna have. All the misunderstandings that's gonna happen. Sometimes I feel like crying just thinking about it. I'm MOSTLY scared whether is he gonna change for the better or not. Or will he still be stuck in his past? That is the MAIN thing that I'm scared about. Told him gazillions of times. Yes of cos he said he's gonna change and all. But all that promises are made when he was inside. Things and mindset might change when he's facing the real world. And friends.

I've gone through so many things. Both with him AND alone. I know I'm strong enough to go through any challenge that GOD give me. But I seriously hate the feeling of being heart broken. IT FEELS LIKE SHIT. I'm terribly scared of getting my heart broken again. And disappointed by him over and over again. I'm sick and tired ar seriously.

The best thing during this 14 months being alone was that I was free from being disappointed and free from arguments. Yes I might miss arguing with him but thinking about it, I rather not argue. It hurts lah.

I shall look on the brightside. Whatever that happens in the future, either good or bad, has a reason behind it. I truly believe that everything happens for a reason.

I'll just hope for the best. For me, him and US. Amin.










The Bachelorette

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Daya
I'm a sucker for LOVE.
Not interested in dramas.
Deeply in love with her one and only,
Mohd Faizrul <3